Take Back the Reins

"We need to be more aware of what we are doing, what we are thinking, and what we are intending to accomplish in order to gain control of what we experience in life."

As you read the last paragraph how many times were you thinking about something other than what you were reading? My question isn’t rooted in deep seeded narcissism but rather to prove a point, one that rocked my paradigm as I began to process Sterner’s book. The idea, for instance, is that I may physically be in class, but am I really there? Am I striving to focus on what is being said and digesting the information I am learning? Or am I thinking about what I’ll have for dinner, or the book I am reading, or that trip I am going on this weekend?

It is difficult to maintain a present mindset, to be focused on now when you are contemplating several other tasks that need to be completed or day dreaming about what you would rather be doing than what you are presently doing.

Sterner defines a practicing mind as one who is focused on the process and the present moment. The author repeatedly emphasizes the importance of staying in the present as the foundation for a practicing mind.  He illustrates this point with an analogy of the mind to a chariot driver. The driver has lost the reins and become a passenger, at the mercy of his horses.  Similarly, an individual who does not take the reins of their mind will be tossed to-and-fro and will lack direction. In contrast, Sterner explains that by focusing on what one is doing now, at any given time he can take back the reins and direct the direction of the chariot.

Now that you are back in control of the reins, where to?

Focus on the Process

"So many people ... look at the process of working for something as an annoying effort they have to go through to get what they want. They make the thing the goal, instead of the process of getting that thing. Just getting the thing produces a very small return on investment of inner joy compared with the dividend gleaned from the process of getting there and achieving the goal. The key word here is achieving. Getting the goal and achieving it are worlds apart. Most people spend their lives on an endless treadmill: they get one thing after another, but they get no experience of lasting joy or personal growth..."

At first it may seem a semantical difference to focus on the process in place of the product. To distinguish the ideas Sterner uses the example of a sailor attempting to reach the horizon. If the sailor uses the horizon as his benchmark for achievement he will forever be disappointed. Despite his most valiant efforts he will always fall short. Instead, if the sailor elected to focus on the sailing of the ship and evaluated his success by that gauge, if he stays in the present moment, his odds of achieving his purpose increase greatly.

What do you use as your metric for success? It is not the process of signing a big new client, but the process and effort you invested to win the account. It is not the graduation ceremony and piece of paper but the process of expanding your mind and developing your abilities over the course of your education that make it a rewarding experience.

Strive to achieve and focus on the process.

Enjoy the Journey

"Do you think that a flower seed sits in the ground and says, ‘This is going to take forever. I have to push all this dirt out of my way just to get to the surface and see the sun... When do I get to bloom? That's when I'll be happy; that's when everybody will be impressed with me.’"

Life is too short to waste the present longing for the future. What frequent things in your life do you fail to notice and enjoy because you are not present? For me, I am able to walk my wife to work on my way to class. That is something I probably will not always be able to do. If I only concentrate on graduation (the goal) I miss an event that when noticed makes the present more enjoyable. By striving to be present and focusing on the process, enjoying the journey becomes more realistic.

To teach this concept Sterner explains that a flower is doing exactly what it should be at each stage of its life. “Just because it does not have brightly colored blooms doesn’t mean it is not a good flower seed. When it first sprouts through the ground, it is not imperfect because it displays only the color green.” The growth of a flower follows a process in which each stage must be completed before the next can begin; it must sprout as a seed long before it can begin to bloom. We should adopt a similar approach to any endeavor in our lives.